i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
