Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize