The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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