I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
