She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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