Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Houston, we have a blender
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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