Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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