I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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