My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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