I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
