Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Randomize