i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Randomize
