hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
