Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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