Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I am puke
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize
