Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Randomize