so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize
