I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize