You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize