no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
People with herpes should wear stickers.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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