after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I didn't notice because vodka
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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