I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize