These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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