Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
people are starting to question the shark bite story
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize