If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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