I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
