tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
