I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
