I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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