my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize