Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
