she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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