I love black thongs
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
