oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize
