They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
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