office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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