Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
40s are totally the cure
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
