just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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