Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Randomize
