im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Randomize