Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
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