I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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