How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
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