Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
why does every cop we meet know your name?
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
