It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Randomize
