i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Randomize
