i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
