I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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