Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
