She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Randomize
