it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
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